Fifth

Sometimes you know there is always this feeling you can’t shake off. You thought it’s temporary but it ended up it’s the otherwise and real.

You know clearly there is no way that it will work out at all but you still want to do something just to see that smile, the look and look forward to the time being together.  

You know clearly nothing will come out from what you have done but you still do it nevertheless.

You know clearly that all the signs are point away but you delude yourself thinking probably you’re being too sensitive.

You know clearly it meant nothing but you deceive yourself that it meant something.

You know clearly you’re being a bother but you still just want to have that a little attention, albeit for a few seconds.

You know clearly you’re not even same league or not even the same sports to being with, but you are doing something out of logical sense.

You know clearly you are not and you will be afraid or even reject the idea, if the opportunity came clear in front of you.

You know clearly that one time that when hands are held for a short while and the hug, you should be contented.

You know clearly that it won’t happen anymore.

You know clearly that it was the last time.

You know clearly it meant nothing.

But you still would do stupid things just to ensure as much as possible the person’s life is easier and taken care of and expect absolutely nothing back. Then you realise only when you’re drunk, the world would then seems to be slightly better, slightly happier and slightly numbed from the emotions.